Does Size Matter?- Part Two

Staff writer Rigby Rat continues to discuss the subject of how much size really factors in sexual relationships.


Your penis size makes no difference if she doesn’t sexually desire you.  And too often a woman dates a man not because she sexually desires him, but because he fills a void.  I know what you’re thinking, “But the sex was hot in the beginning.”  I’m sure it was.

Look, everyone knows – when the dating begins – that the sex is radioactive.  Right?  (At least that’s what he thinks.)  But is the sex real?  Too often it isn’t because women fake orgasm.  They fake orgasm because women know they can’t snag a guy unless the bedroom show is like a Cirque du Soliel extravaganza.  And that is why the sex is hot in the beginning.  Now you’re thinking, “Then how do I know if she truly desires me?”  Good question.


A. She initiates sex as much as I do.
B. She initiates sex more than I do.
C. She initiates sex outside the bedroom.
D. She initiates sex during the day.
E.  It’s way past the dating stage and she still initiates sex.
F.  We’ve been married for ________ years and she still initiates sex.
G.  All of the above.

You say: “Okay, she doesn’t truly desire me, but I don’t want to give up on her.  So, what exactly goes into an orgasm?”

The answer to that question is letter D: I’ll ask her and get back to you. (See DOES SIZE MATTER, Part One, 10/23/12.)

Yep, you need to get inside her head before you get inside her body.  And remember, she is not your ex.  She is somebody new and different.  Which means, what worked for Ginger doesn’t mean it’s going to work for Abbey.  Hence, you gotta ask Abbey.

Also, it’s not just what goes into a woman’s orgasm, it’s what DOESN’T go into a woman’s orgasm that matters as well.  What doesn’t go into a woman’s orgasm?  Again, each woman is different.  So, ask her. To help you until then, here are just a few things that don’t go into a woman’s orgasm.  Meaning, do the following and rest assured she’ll just lie there like a blow up doll:

1.  Lie to her.
2.  Text/call your ex-girlfriend.
3.  Talk about your ex-girlfriend.
4.  Act insecure.
5.  Act and talk like a dimwit, prick, etc.
6.  Be verbally and physically abusive to her.
7.  Treat her like she’s your mother.
8.  Emotionally blackmail her to get your way.
9.  Set your emotional baggage at her feet.
10. Watch porn.
11. Hang out with your guy friends instead of her.
12. Spend your money on drugs and alcohol.

No doubt, many women could add to this list – a few guys, too.  And you should.

Bottom line, penis size is the least of your worries when it comes to pleasing a woman.  Women need to be pleased in other ways.  First and foremost, they need to feel your love.  Love is what you inwardly are, and what you outwardly do.  Love can be real, love can be an illusion.  Many times after dinner and a movie and a roll between the sheets, it’s an illusion.  Yet, you both mistakenly call it love.  Oh, well, live and learn.  And the other lesson for today is: penis size only counts in porno movies because porn peddlers need to lure the curious, the insecure, and the fops to sell their movies to.

The Male Orgasm: Kick It Up A Notch

When we typically think about the male orgasm, we typically think only about the penis; but in doing so, we miss so many other ways to give pleasure. So with that in mind, here is the article I promised a couple of weeks ago with some tips I learned at The Pleasure Chest Chicago. Try them out and enjoy!

1)   Talk about comfort levels. Be open in your communication with your partner. You can’t really be sure what your partner is or isn’t open to unless you hear it from them first. While some things might be okay to guess about, sex isn’t one of them. Talk about what you want, what you need to be relaxed and receptive to pleasure, and talk about what you would be open to trying in the future. Don’t forget safety first! Have condoms at the ready, lube for more comfortable and smoother play, and glove it up in addition to the lube for anal play.

2)   Explore. You can think you are the best lover in the world and what you have always done in the past with other partners will work with present and future partners; but this isn’t always the case. What may work with one doesn’t always work with all. The best way to figure out just what gets your partner’s engine revving is to explore your partner’s body (with permission of course) and pay attention to their responses.

3)   Let your lips, tongue, and fingers do the walking. Kissing isn’t just for lips, hands, and necks. You can also use your lips, tongue, and fingers for seduction. To begin, you can both have some wet soapy fun in the shower or tub and use the water and soap as an extra seduction tool. Who said bathing can’t be fun, relaxing, and erotic?  After you two get squeaky clean, then you can proceed to get a little or very dirty…Take your man by the hand and move towards a flat surface to move on to the next part of the fun. With your fingertips, start at the scalp and massage to help make your partner as relaxed as possible and slowly start moving down his body. As you move towards his temples and further down the body, you should add your lips and tongue to the relaxation and stimulation. When you get to the genitals, have fun with exploring the pelvic area, his balls, and the far underestimated sweet spot between his balls and anus. Try some light scratching, and then start adding some pressure to massage with your fingertips. Don’t forget to make this interactive and ask what he likes and how hard and how soft he wants you to touch him. If you decide to do a little more direct prostate play, lube it and glove it up and start slowly so he can relax first and leave the penis for last.  Think of the penis as being like a tasty popsicle or ice cream cone and start from the bottom or top depending how you want to start your endgame tongue tease, just make sure you don’t neglect any spot from head to shaft. Listen to your partner’s responses both verbal and non-verbal to get a roadmap to all the right spots to send your partner into orbital orgasmic bliss. Once know the spots that will be sure to make your partner’s body sing, and then they’ll be putty in your hands.

Go make your weekend sizzle and enjoy!

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