I CAN’T TALK TO HER. I CAN’T TALK TO HIM.

Turning tables with the headphones on? The biggest lessons in life as well as in relationships: listen, learn, and grow. This week’s post by staff writer Rigby Rat discusses why keeping your ears and opinions open and your mouth shut can go a long way to making a happy relationship.

When your guy points out an unattractive trait of yours, do you zip it, listen, and appreciate his input, or do you get defensive? Turn the tables?

For example: He told you that you interrupt people. You replied, “So do you”. He told you that you’re always late. You replied, “So are you”. He told you that you turn everything into a fight. You replied, “It’s your fault we fight.

If you’re a defensive Donna or a turn-the-tables Tomika, know this – just because you can’t – or refuse to – see your flaws doesn’t mean the rest of the world is wearing rose-colored glasses.

So, when he recognizes your shortcomings – and clues you in – instead of becoming defensive, be grateful he has your back and that you have an ally. If you’re not grateful, and instead ignore or attack your ally, you’ll never grow as a person. If you never grow as a person, you and your mate will surely drift apart as a couple. He will be more evolved, and you won’t. When couples grow apart, relationships fail. When your relationship begins to fail, he’ll look for a woman who is just as evolved as he is. When he finds her, you’ll be history and wishing you had put a sock in it, listened to his input, and arrived at his boss’s luncheon on time.

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