Till Two Years Do You Part?


 

The institution of marriage is on one side magical and full of hope and on the other side, daunting and full of “what ifs”. Someday in the near future, couples could have the option of a short term marriage of two years at the end of which the couples can either choose to continue the marriage or walk away free and clear without a messy divorce. Would this make marriage more palatable? Would this help change the idea of “well, if it doesn’t work out, there’s always divorce.”? I think this spin on traditional marriage could make things far less scary and even improve societal views on it. In an age of sky rocketing divorce rates, this could almost be a “golden ticket” to marital bliss.

On the other side, thinking traditionally, this would seem a mockery to such an important institution. When you think about marriage, you think “till death do us part”. You don’t think, “well, we agreed to two years…let’s see how it goes.” You think, “I promised the rest of my life for better or worse.”  

We know that human nature is flawed and very much so imperfect. An allowance for a short term marriage contract could provide for that even in marriage. We’d like to think that we could stick it out in a marriage until death; but let’s face it, having a clean escape is very appealing. This doesn’t mean we love our mate any less, this just means that we’re expanding on how a long term relationship changes and grows. In the dating stage, there’s no need for a license and legalities. If the relationship works, you stay together; if it doesn’t, you breakup and move on.

Is it really so wrong to consider a short term marriage if the end result is a happy, healthy relationship that progressed without the pressure of “till death”?  

 

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7 thoughts on “Till Two Years Do You Part?

  1. I don’t personally think this is a solution, only because at the end of the two years or of the “term,” when one person (or both) walks away, the hurt would be just as painful as a divorce. I mean, how could it be less messy, if the couple was sharing everything? And if they weren’t sharing everything, was it really a marriage? And if it’s not a marriage, why throw a wedding for a two year relationship? Of course the vows would have to be re-written. It seems like this concept would eliminate the wedding, because I don’t think such a grand event is worth something that will likely only last two years–especially if you are entering with the mindset of “we’ll just see where this goes and if it works and if it doesn’t, then we can bow out pretty quickly.” It seems to me that this would not be marriage. It would be something else altogether. People often forget that marriage, though it can be truly wonderful, requires a daily effort from both husband and wife. Not just a “Let’s give it a try.”

  2. Pingback: BodyAwareGrieving, with Margo Rose. Practical, body-focused strategies for personal care during times of loss and change. Romance: Till Two Years Do You Part? : BodyAwareGrieving

  3. I wouldn’t do it. Why? Because marriage takes hard work and I think entering into it with a mindset “Well, we can have two years and see how it goes” it would have less of an incentive for you to work through your problems if you know it will shortly be over. Instead, knowing that it is hard to get a divorce and knowing you promised for life, can be an incentive for you to try and work through your problems. In marriage, you need to learn how to compromise and communicate and why do that if you know you just have an easy out?

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