Do you feel as if you and your mate are at cross-purposes sometimes? It’s probably because you are. It’s usually not the aim of a couple to be in conflict with each other; but this is what happens when there is a lack of communication and understanding. I’m sure you’ve thought at one time or another: “I’ve said this HUNDREDS of times! Why aren’t I getting through to them?” or “Why is he or she not hearing me?”. I can say with surety that in about 90% of those instances, they heard you. The problem is that they weren’t LISTENING. We feel that the concepts “hearing” and “listening” are interchangeable and that to drive our meaning through, we only need to repeat what we want. While it seems logical that to speak to someone automatically equals understanding on the on the listener’s side, we have to allow for the reality that listening is double-sided. The speaker needs to listen just as much as the listener.

What are your thoughts? Do you agree or disagree? Comment or send your story about your own relationship!

3 thoughts on “Listen

  1. i def. agree me and my bf never seem to get along and every month it seems like we are having “the talk” about the same matters. its been this way for a while…now im just like i dont even want to talk we talk about the same things and never see progress…*shrug*

  2. I completely understand. I had the same problem with my boyfriend for months at the beginning of our relationship. Then when we were trying to move forward with trying again with each other after a breakup, we talked and realized that we had been continually been talking in circles. With this realization, we were finally ready to listen to each other. We stopped seeing our conversations as “talks” and started to see them as ways to be a better couple by listening and keeping our minds and hearts open to what we were hearing. We realized that jumping to the negative and essentially expecting for conversations to go badly between us, we were pretty much making our fights a self-fulfilling prophecy.

    Think about what you want to accomplish, how you want the talk to go, and what you need moving forward.

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