We’ve all heard the typical stereotypes like: “Women are just so clingy” or “Men have to stay in control; it’s the natural way of things”. Now don’t misunderstand me. I’m not saying that there aren’t clingy women, but I will say that women don’t corner the market on clingy. Most people have seen or heard about clingy men almost as much as we dump on clingy women. When we talk about clingy men, the description of clingy is usually synonymous with being possessive and controlling. Sure, depending on the physical proportions of the man, the words “whipped” or “weak” also come to mind; but let’s face it women are usually seen as the clingy ones in a relationship. We do have relationships out there that are relatively equal with a near 50% split on decisions and we also have relationships in which the woman is in control and while these types of relationships are growing somewhat in prevalence, relationships tend to be more “male in control”.
Another example is from the book “The Ultimate Guide for Men to Understand Women” by Alex & Elizabeth Lluch. In this book, the authors use the scenario of a male’s penchant for porn as an instant threat to a relationship in the woman’s eyes. In this book, the authors imply that women as a whole view porn (i.e. porn magazines and strip clubs) as a statement meaning that the man in the relationship doesn’t find her desirable enough or fulfilling enough so he has to “get his fill” elsewhere. While I agree with the authors’ suggestion to have a conversation about your reasons for the man’s possible need for porn I disagree with the suggestion to pick and choose what to tell your mate and tell only some of the reasons. A lie by omission is still a lie. Everyone has their reasons for their deeds and beliefs; but along similar lines, it’s not good to assume, as it seems to make fools of the assumer and the assumed. Are we coming to our own conclusions about things or are we letting our minds be made up for us?