Guest blogger Bella Werner gives great ideas to keep the fire going in a marriage. Enjoy!
All couples find themselves in a cool spell now and then. It’s easy to take your spouse for granted, fall into a routine, and wind up neglecting the one you love. Occasionally you need to shake things up. Spontaneity is the key. Anything to break out of the dull old routine you’ve both been stuck in since forever.
Here’s an easy way to break out of a cool spell. Plan some fun, playful, and sexy time together to feel the heat this winter.
Not only does it give you a chance to do something new together but food can be very sensual. An old-fashioned spaghetti dinner is a great start. While the sauce is simmering, ask your husband to show you how to “stir the sauce” (be sure he gets behind you). Taste the sauce with a little flirtatious slurp from the spoon and a bat of the eyelashes. Or, initiate a “taco Tuesday” night. It doesn’t get complicated and it can be very spicy — in more ways than one. While chopping the vegetables, toss a piece of cilantro at him…this might be all you need to do to start a frolicsome (low key if you’d like) food fight, which is fun at any age.
Transform your bathroom into a heavenly romantic hideaway; a place you can climb into a basin of bubbly water; a place lit by the glow of candlelight (possibly some twinkly lights); a place where the sounds of soft jazz fills the air and where champagne (or sparkling water) accompanies chocolate-covered strawberries. Start the hot tub date in one of your sexy bikinishidden under a soft robe.
Get out the sheets and blankets, move around the furniture and build a fort in the living room. Pack a picnic and some games to play (Candy Land, Operation, Battleship, Hungry Hungry Hippos) and once the fort is complete, hang out in there all day.
Take it outdoors and run through sprinklers together, play hide-and-seek or tag, and have a water fight with some classic water guns. Be kids and leave your worries behind.
When the sun goes down, get a blanket and some pillows and step outside. Whether it’s your backyard, a local park or a quiet destination away from the city lights, take a few hours to get lost in the night sky.
It’s amazing how easy it is to let your fears and worries dissipate as your mind begins to explore the universe. You and your hubby might just solve the world’s biggest problems together.
And remember, intimacy is the key, but falling alseep to soon can be the enemy of intimacy. While you may need to be touched more, he may need you to do things for him to feel loved. A well-known relationship counselor, Gary Chapman, proposes the idea that there are “Five Love Languages” and while you may think your mate is one way, he may have completely different needs. While some people need to hear words of affirmation to feel loved, others find that receiving gifts or acts of service are the ways to the heart.
Hopefully, you’ll find that if you take charge of this re-ignition, he will get ideas of his own to keep it fresh, fun, and spicy.