How To Be The Other Woman

This week’s post by staff writer Rigby Rat talks about other woman etiquette and advice and the “low-down” of what being the other woman truly means.

 

 

First of all, you should NEVER be the other woman.  There are plenty of unattached/ unmarried guys to go around.  And if he makes the advances first, know this, a guy who cheats on his wife or girlfriend is only looking out for his needs, not yours.

 

However, if you already started your affair, do you really know how to be the other woman?  First, you gotta play the game by his rules.  What are his rules?  He’ll let you know by his actions.  For example, if you call/text him and he doesn’t answer it means he’s with his family. It also means he isn’t going to respond when he’s with them.  So don’t waste your time trying to communicate with him when you know he’s with the wife and kids.

 

Don’t be possessive.  A married man does not like a possessive mistress.  Act accordingly.  Meaning, be independent. Aloof.  Don’t show excessive desire to possess him.  That’s his wife’s calling, not yours.

 

Don’t hound him to leave his wife.  If he wanted to leave his wife, he’d be single.

 

Don’t tell him that you love him.

 

Don’t expect him to profess his love for you.  He loves his wife, the kids, the dog, and all those TVs, not you.

 

Don’t get “accidently” pregnant.   Meaning, he doesn’t need you to unexpectedly complicate his life.

 

Don’t look at – or acknowledge – him if you accidentally run into him and his wife.  Making him have to explain how he knows you will put him in an awkward position.  Never, ever put a cheating husband in an awkward position.  It will piss him off big time.

 

Don’t expect to spend holidays with him.  Expect him to spend holidays with his family.  Why?  Because you’re not family.  You’re an outsider.

 

Don’t give him ultimatums.  When push comes to shove, the mistress is always given her walking papers when she makes trouble.  And what’s an even worse feeling than getting dumped by your boyfriend?  Being given a pink slip by some low-life, cheating husband.

 

Do you get it now?  The mistress is lowest on the food chain.  Yet, she doesn’t feel that way.  At least, not in the beginning.  Soon, though, she’ll realize her position: an on-call vagina with none of the perks a wife has.

 

Just know this, having an affair with a married man is not for the squeamish.  Oh, and if you think you’ll convince him to change his mind and leave her for you, get real.  The chances of that happening are slim to none.  Remember, if he wanted to be single, he would be.  But if per chance he does leave her, don’t expect your relationship with him to be tight, balanced, or based on love and respect.  Instead, expect him to constantly wonder and worry if you’re cheating on him.  And, naturally, you’ll be forever worried sick if he’s cheating on you.  Not a healthy way to start a relationship, right?

 

Let’s recap: He’s got a wife, kids, a house, a dog, a TV set in every room of the house, and you.  What do you have?  Some woman’s cheating husband.  Is that the best you can do?

 

What’s that old saying?  You’re judged by the company you keep.

Are you sure you want to be a mistress?

 

 

 

 

 

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